How I Learned to Say No to Work & Say Yes to Family: Finding Balance by Setting Boundaries & Embracing the Moment
As a busy mom, I’ve often felt the weight of trying to juggle work, family life, and personal well-being. Time constraints and budgeting challenges are a constant reminder that we can’t do it all, no matter how hard we try. But I’ve realised that in order to truly live and enjoy the precious moments with my family, I need to make some hard choices. Here’s how I learned to say “no” to work and say “yes” to what matters most.
1. Setting Boundaries with Work
The first step in creating space for family time is establishing clear boundaries with work. I’ve learned that as much as I want to be available to clients and colleagues, I cannot be available all the time. With time constraints, I now set specific hours when I’m open to work and stick to them. When I’m with my family, I’m with them—not checking emails or answering calls. I communicate these boundaries to others and make it clear that family time is so important to me. It’s a small but powerful decision to prioritise my loved ones and my own well-being.
2. Silencing WhatsApp and Phones
It’s easy to fall into the habit of constantly checking your phone. Notifications from work, group chats, and social media can pull me away from family moments in an instant. So, I now silence my WhatsApp and put my phone on Do Not Disturb during family time. This simple step helps me remain present with my children and partner, and I can always check in on messages later. No one’s work is so urgent that it needs to interrupt quality time.
3. Planning Ahead for Fun Family Activities
Another key to making family time a priority is budgeting and planning ahead for fun activities. Whether it’s a visit to a local park, a film night, or a weekend adventure, I budget specifically for these moments. Knowing that I have planned and saved for them removes any stress about spending. I also plan activities in advance, so I’m not scrambling at the last minute. By planning ahead, I can relax and enjoy the time without worrying about finances or time limitations.
4. Making Time for Self-Care and Personal Development
Incorporating personal development and self-care into my routine is a must. It’s easy to put yourself last as a busy mom, but I’ve learned that I can’t pour from an empty cup. I now schedule moments of self-care, whether it’s meditation, reading, or simply sitting in silence for a few minutes. And while I’m focused on family activities, I’ve learned to also schedule time for myself to recharge, to be a better, more present mom. Taking care of my mental health and personal growth allows me to feel more balanced, which in turn helps me be more present with my loved ones.
5. Saying “I Will Call at [Time]”
When I do need to attend to work or personal calls, I’ve learned to manage expectations by saying, “I’ll call you back at [time].” This allows me to stay on track with family activities without the constant distraction of phone calls or messages. I can give my attention fully to what matters in the moment and then attend to other things when the time is right.
6. The Power of Living in the Moment
The most powerful shift I’ve made is simply living in the moment. I used to rush through getting ready for family activities, feeling frazzled as I tried to juggle it all. But now, I’ve learned to enjoy the process—planning my clothes ahead of time, taking the time to enjoy getting ready, and being present as I prepare for family adventures. It’s about slowing down, removing the pressure of time constraints, and really appreciating the here and now.
7. Improved Sleep Quality for Moms
With better time management and self-care, I’ve noticed an improvement in my sleep quality. By setting boundaries with work, making time for family, and carving out moments for myself, I can rest easier at night. Sleep is crucial for our mental and physical health, and I’ve found that when I’m more intentional about balancing work, family, and personal time, my overall well-being improves.
So, In My Conclusion: Finding Peace in Family Time
I’ve learned that it’s okay to say no—to work, to obligations, and to stress. By creating boundaries, planning ahead, and prioritising my family’s needs, I’ve found a sense of peace. I’m more present with my kids, I’m able to enjoy our time together, and I’m also taking care of myself.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the demands of both work and family, consider trying some of these strategies. By setting boundaries, managing your time, and prioritising self-care, you’ll find that you can create balance without the guilt.
Remember, we don’t have to do it all. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to say no to work and yes to living in the moment. You deserve it.
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Journal Prompts and Information Links:
1. Journal Prompts to Explore Areas for Improvement
Use these prompts to explore different aspects of your life to identify areas that need work and areas where you feel content:
- Areas of Happiness:
- What aspects of my life currently make me feel joyful or fulfilled?
- What are the moments in my day when I feel most at peace or most alive?
- What are three things I am most grateful for right now?
- Areas for Growth:
- In which areas of my life do I feel unfulfilled or frustrated?
- What things in my life drain my energy or cause stress?
- What habits do I have that prevent me from feeling more joy or peace?
- Setting Goals for Improvement:
- What small changes could I make today that would bring more joy and balance?
- What are three steps I can take in the next week to focus on the areas where I want to improve?
2. Journal Prompts to Identify Negative Things in Your Life
These prompts will help you identify areas in your life where you might be holding on to negativity. Once you recognize them, you can begin to take steps toward removing what no longer serves you.
- Identifying Negative Patterns:
- What negative thoughts or beliefs do I often hold onto about myself or my situation?
- Are there any habits I have that are holding me back from growth or happiness?
- What are the things or people in my life that consistently drain my energy or cause stress?
- Reframing Negative Thoughts:
- How can I reframe these negative thoughts or beliefs to something more empowering?
- What would it look like if I let go of the things that no longer serve me?
- What positive actions could I take to replace negative habits or thoughts?
- Narrowing Down What You Want:
- What is one thing I want more of in my life?
- How can I align my actions today with the vision of who I want to become?
- What is one step I can take today to move closer to the life I want?
3. Science of Gratitude
Here’s a link you can use to explore the science behind gratitude:
- The Science of Gratitude: How Practicing Gratitude Can Improve Your Well-Being
This article from Psychology Today explains how gratitude works in the brain, its positive effects on mental health, and how regular practice can improve overall well-being. Also see this inspirational video explanation.